What Scripture Says About the Way We Love
When the Bible talks about love, it means more than romance. From 1 Corinthians 13's description of love to Ephesians 5's call to husbands and wives, Scripture gives a portrait of love that is demanding of itself, patient with others, costly, and ultimately shaped by how God loves us. The goal isn't a feeling to chase but a way of life to grow into.
"Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not arrogant, is not rude, is not self-seeking, is not irritable, and does not keep a record of wrongs." (1 Corinthians 13:4-5 CSB)
Most of what we think we know about love, we learned from somewhere other than the Bible. We learned it from movies, from our own families, from trial and painful error. And most of what we learned was incomplete.
I say that because I've been married long enough to experience the gap between what I thought love was and what it actually asks of me. We think love is a feeling you have or a feeling you lost. The Bible says it's something else entirely.
What follows isn't a list of Bible verses about relationships for the sake of having a list. It's a walk through what Scripture actually says, and it's worth sitting with because what the Bible says is both harder and more hopeful than most of us expect.
What 1 Corinthians 13 Is Actually Saying
When Paul describes love in 1 Corinthians 13:4–7, the context matters. He isn’t writing a wedding reading—although it’s still good for that. He’s writing to a church that was tearing itself apart over gifts, status, and who mattered most.
The description of love he gives isn’t a romantic portrait. It’s a corrective. Love is patient, meaning patient with the person who keeps doing the thing that exhausts you. Love is kind, meaning kind when kindness is not what you feel like offering. It does not keep a record of wrongs—love doesn’t build a case file to pull out in the next argument.
Read that way, 1 Corinthians 13 confronts the way we naturally “love”. It describes real love at its full cost.
But Paul doesn’t leave it there. He says love “never ends” (v. 8). The love described here, the costly, patient, record-burning kind, is the permanent thing. Everything else passes. This lasts forever.
1 Corinthians 13 holds out a challenge to us to love like God loves. It’s a reminder of what God says love looks like, not what culture says.
What Ephesians 5 Says About Marriage
Ephesians 5:25–33 is so important to read carefully.
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her.” (Ephesians 5:25 CSB)
That’s the center of it. The husband’s call is to love like Christ loved, which is sacrificially and unconditionally, not as the one who is served but as the one who gives. This is not a power structure. It’s a pattern of living that flows from Christ’s own love for His people.
Verse 28 continues: “In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” Love your wife as your own body—not as an object to manage but as part of yourself. You tend to your body without being told. You don’t resent its needs.
What makes this possible is what Paul says in verse 32: “This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.” The love between husband and wife is supposed to be a picture of something else, the love Christ has for His people. That is a high calling, and no one lives up to it fully. But we need to press on and make every effort to allow the Holy Spirit to teach us to live this way.
Notice that Paul’s command to husbands doesn’t rest on something their wives will do. We are supposed to love our wives this way regardless of what is returned. It’s not a negotiation or a point of leverage. It’s a crucial way we model the character of Jesus.
I’m so glad there’s grace for us when we fail in this, but let’s not use that grace as an excuse to ignore what God has called us to.
Colossians 3 and the Daily Practice of Love
If Ephesians 5 sets the vision, Colossians 3:12–14 gives the texture of daily life.
"Therefore, as God's chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another... Above all, put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity." (Colossians 3:12–14 CSB)
Notice "put on." These are not feelings that arise naturally. They are garments you choose. You put on gentleness the way you put on a coat, as a decision before the interaction, not as a reaction during it.
"Bearing with one another" means tolerating the parts of another person that are hard to live with. Not fixing, not managing, but enduring with patience. And forgiving "if anyone has a complaint" — the implication is that there will be complaints. This is life with real people.
Walking in love like Jesus is a daily practice, not a single decision. It is the direction your life keeps reorienting toward through the Holy Spirit. He will teach us how to love more and more like Jesus.
Frequently Asked Questions About Bible Verses and Relationships
What does the Bible say about relationships in general?
The Bible's vision for relationships isn't primarily about romance. It's about love as a practice, shaped by how God has loved us. From Proverbs to the Gospels, the consistent thread is: love your neighbor, bear with one another, forgive as you have been forgiven. Romantic relationships and marriage get specific attention in Ephesians 5, Song of Solomon, 1 Corinthians 7, and other places, but the relational teaching runs through all of Scripture.
What Bible verse talks about relationships?
Several passages speak directly to how we relate to each other. 1 Corinthians 13:4–7 gives the most complete portrait of love's character. Romans 12:10 says "love one another deeply as brothers and sisters; take the lead in honoring one another." Colossians 3:12–14 addresses the daily habits of love in a household. John 13:34–35 records Jesus saying that loving one another is the mark that identifies His followers.
What does Scripture say about love in marriage?
Ephesians 5:25–33 is a central marriage passage. Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church, sacrificially and with full investment. Proverbs 31:10 says a capable wife's "value is far above jewels." We should treat our wives this way. Marriage in Scripture is both a practical relationship and a picture of God's covenant love for His people. The goal isn't a perfect partnership but a faithful one that reflects how God loves.
What is the most important Bible verse about relationships?
That depends on which relationship you're asking about. For romantic love and marriage, Ephesians 5 is foundational. For relationships more broadly (including marriage) John 13:34–35 is spectacularly helpful: "Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples." 1 Corinthians 13 is also essential.
What does God say about how we should treat each other?
The short answer is Matthew 22:39: "Love your neighbor as yourself." The entire law, Jesus said, hangs on love for God and love for neighbor. What that looks like in practice: patience, kindness, keeping no record of wrongs, forgiving as you have been forgiven, bearing with one another even when it is hard. The standard is always set by how God has treated us, not by what the other person deserves.
What This Means for the Relationships in Front of You
The Bible doesn't give you a formula for a good marriage or a rule list for how to be a good friend. It gives you a picture of love as it comes from God, works through God's people, and shapes the ordinary moments of daily life.
That picture is demanding. Patient when you are exhausted. Kind when you have been wronged. Forgiving when you have every right to hold the offense.
And it is hopeful. Because the love described in these verses isn't something you manufacture. It is something God works in you as you stay close to Him. 1 John 4:19 says "we love because he first loved us." The capacity to love well comes from being loved. The love God has poured into you through Christ is what makes the love in Colossians 3 and 1 Corinthians 13 possible.
The people in front of you today, even the ones who are hard for you to love, are the actual territory where this works itself out. Not in theory but in practice.
He loved you first. That is where the love that holds everything together starts.